Looking back at 2015 through my shitty camera

So today we had our school advent/advance Xmas (whatever) Cleberation and school is officially closed for this year. It kinda feels like 31st Decemer. I was looking at photos from my phone and this strange feeling humans called 'nostalgia' tookover me and I wanted to share some of these pictures with you. Here's a little  sneak into my boring life, I'm just a middle school teacher.

Sister and cousin trying out wedding dress.

We talked politics, democracy, religion and society.... Guys will understand 

I love bullet,even this one

He knows what he's doin

Planting trees with Cl VII students

Getting in touch with my childhood. Thanks @Zara

Shitty phone camera,  perfect moment no less

So shy

Defenders, Girls football, sigh

Real happiness, kids don't fake. KIDS DON'T FAKE. 

The Joy is real

El Classico at my school

 Right footwork, maybe future Zotlang FC 

Mixed emotions at house sports

Dear Friend Lailai weds Bethsy. Saiha

Love this picture

Wishing you all the best

Sir Thlantea after his bike accident 

Sir Thlantea, doing what he does best, climbing our butterfruit tree. That ass though

Sir Thlantea strikes again. check out the shoes

Lighting Workshop at I&PR Lunglei with Pioneer Mizo Filmaker, Mapuia Chawngthu. 

My teachers, now my co-workers and still my teachers in life. Sir Zama and Miss Chhuani exchange gifts at CES Advance Xmas

Pu Khara and Pu Rokhuma (RIP, National teacher awardee), My Principal gives rose to my Ex Principal who was his teacher at teachers day, Heart melting stuff right here. I'm proud to say I've learnt under both of them.

Sold my old Scooter

Sold my good camera. sniff
Sold everything.... The economy... Lalthanhawla ..right???? 

A rainy sunday evening near my house @ Serkawn. Something about rain just makes me emotional

Sir Larry and Sir Valtea aka Laurel and Hardy (Laurel and Hardy, 80s kids will remember)       

I love all you guys so I hope none of you get offended by these photos. Will add more photos before new year.

Football, Yes, Chelsea, Yes!

I was planning to blog about my team winning the Premiere League but I have been too lazy and the new season has already began and as a Chelsea fan since 2001 I feel obliged to part some of my 'wisdom' and observation on last season and what I expect will happen this season.

So Chelsea won the League in the second season of Jose Mourinho's return and last season was quite epic for so many reasons. It was the last season for Drogba and Cech and Lampard played his last Premiere League match with freakin Man City. Here are some of my favorite moments from last year season.

Costa vs Kompany : Its not a fight by the way, I can't remember which match it was or who won that match but it was that moment when Costa and Kompany went 1v1. Seeing those two very very aggressive and physical players shoulder to shoulder was so F***ing brutal. I had a Costagasm tbh. We may yet send humans to Mars but seeing Costa and Kompany battling it out in my day was something special.

 My no 2 moment was PSG vs Chelsea 2nd leg. We went out of the Champions league without loosing a single game. But the PSG game was just so bad, we couldn't beat 10 men PSG at home and worst of all was the manner in which we went out. Everyone was just walking around and the players didn't even looked half dissapointed as they should.

Frankie Lampard's goal against Chelsea was just wrong on so many levels. Chelsea fans called him Judas, seriously???? Here's my opinion Lamps feels he's good enough to play another and was content to be a sub even and I feel he is still a game changer when he comes as a sub. But Chelsea denied him that opportunity after all that he has given to the club. So City took him because they knew he was still a quality player and he scored quite a few important goals as well proving a lot of people wrong. He should have left the Chelsea with a League Title, and deservingly I must say. Have a little heart Jose, that's not how you treat a legend.

Moving on to the new season. Lots of teams signing new players and Chelsea will probably not sign anymore players if Mourinho is to be believed. I am not too jealous of other club signings except Peter Cech going to Arsenal. If you ask me he's still better than Cortois. Realistically if I was to sign another player I would go for Ibrahimovich instead of Falcao. I think it could have happened because Ibra was saying him leaving PSG was up to his agent which meant that he was ready to leave, and Mourinho is one of his favourite boss. Imagine Costa and Ibrahimovich together at Chelsea, defenders would shit their pants.

But it does not look like its going to happen and what we've got are Falcao and Remy. Last season Remy did what he was suppose to do that is score goals when Costa was injured. We are yet to see what Flacao will do but I disagree when people make it sound like Chelsea is taking risk by signing Falcao. Its not like we expect him to score 20 goals or play 30 league games, if he does, great and if he don't, not an issue. What he is is a back up for Costa, also he will be paid half of what he was paid at United. If he scores 10 goals for us I would consider it a good signing. But still the problem with these two players is that they can't hold the ball and they don't play like the Target man striker that Chelsea is used to like Drogba and Costa. When Costa is out the whole team lacks direction, some one to give the ball and move forward and Remy and Falcao are just not that type of players.

I was watching our opening match against Swansea last night and even though it was just a draw i was pretty happy. Its not the end of the world, we could have lost and we drew, I saw the Chelsea we saw in the first half of last season and most of the players were continuinig what they did last season. If Costa is not injured I think we can defend the title. What worries me though is Cortois, he is a good goalkeeper but he lacks experience and it shows several times last season and the reason we could only get a draw was because he got sent off. Maybe it was bad judgement from the refree but he had too many of these moments when he cost us the game, this is why Chech is still better. Its so  F****d up that we sell him to Arsenal. David Luiz (even though I am happy he left) scored against us, Lampard scored against us and now you give one of the best goalkeepers in the world to your rivals. Cech is not only going to be a great goalie for Arsenal, he is also going to be a great plus to the defence because he is very vocal, team captain material, and he is a winner and that winner mentality will surely and unfortunately rub off to his new team mates. Giving Cech to Arsenal to me is a bigger mistake than letting Lampard go to City, and he still have at least 3 good seasons I feel. So brace yourself Chelsea fans, Cech will make that controversial match winning saves against Chelsea for at least three seasons. Begovic who came in for Cortois was not bad though, pulled off some great saves and he was a good buy imo.

Another player that worries me in that game was Ivanovic, he was just constantly overpaced by that guy Moreno, I have never heard of him btw and that's not good because I remember El Mohamedy from Hull (I think) was running circles around Ashley Cole and soon after that he lost his first eleven spot and ultimately his Chelsea carreer. I serioulsy hope Iva was just having a bad game and he is not on the decline. He was one of the best defenders last year and who could forget the amount of goals he scored last season and as a defender no less. Gary Cahill was not too impressive btw, but with Terry he's a decent player but I would trade him for Stones in a heart beat. Kurt Zouma is going to be the rock of Chelsea defense in the near future. Have you seen how good he is in the air? He may need more experience but he is a star in the making.

While we are at Kurt Zouma have you noticed French players recently? I feel they are going through a golden generation right now, look at the new players they have Varane, Zouma, Pogba, Matuidi, Griezman, Kondogbia, Benzema. If they win the next Euros I would not be surprised.    

Back to Chelsea, Even though we did not make too many signings I am pretty happy with our squad provided there are no long injuries. I was a little worried about Matic because his form was dropping after he was sent off and injured but seeing his game vs Swansea I think he's back. Fabregas will continue to assist, Hazard can only get better , believe me he is still not at his peak and I hope the Brazillian duo Willian and Oscar will have a breakthrough season,

Finally, lets talk about Mourinho, Even though I criticised him for letting Lampard and Cech go I know he is the best man for Chelsea. He has his own way of dealing with issues and that's why some people hate him and that's why I love him. After winning the title he was interviewed and was asked if his current team was better than his previous Chelsea team, his answer was "it depends on who is the manager". When he came back to Chelsea I saw a very different Mourinho, he was not the cocky arrogant young manager he once was. Of course he is still arrogant but you can see a more mature Mourinho who still has the desire to win. He seemed like a yogi who returned after spending some years meditating in the Himalayans with the Bhuddist monks or something. He said he was now the Happy One, he said he was home and several other emotional things that made him sound like an actual human being. He looked at the squad and began to work straight at it,  

To wrap this up I would predict Chelsea and City to be the main title contenders this season. If we can reach the quarter final in Champions League I would be quite satisfied. Another FA Cup or Carling cup would be nice as well. Lets hope things gets better after that draw and I hope we sign Stones.

Keep The Blue Flag Flying High.

Jealousy

I have to admit.

I am jealous,

I'm jealous because everyone seems to be having so much fun.

I am jealous when my friends gets better jobs than me.

I am jealous seeing my ex class mates are traveling around the world while I am stuck here,

I'm jealous seeing my childhood friends who are now so mature and so full of confidence while I am still the same insecure little child 10 years ago. 

But what hurts the most is that I am jealous towards my friends who have become successful. Believe me I want to be happy for you because I know you will be happy for me. I have great friends and maybe I don't deserve them.

I know its wrong and I want to be happy for you, because you are a great friend.  But jealousy is in me and it knows no friend or enemy. I guess its in my blood and I can't fight it.

I congratulate you, fake a smile and shake your hand but you are not a fool and can tell from my eyes that I am jealous of you. Then do forgive me because I hate this jealousy too.

Jealousy Won't You Ever Leave Me Alone.

The rebel in me

It's not an ideal holiday plan I had in mind but my parents desperately wanted me to go to this gospel camp tomorrow and its going to last for three days. It sux coz I only have just about five days before we start school again and I'm not really a spiritual person.

Apart from me being anti-social, gospel camping is really not my thing. I'd rather find God by myself and I prefer not to cry, dance, scream Halleluia and share my testimony in front of the hundreds of people. So just because my father is a pastor don't expect the Kumbaya shit from me after I come back, not gonna happen.
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In my opinion our community has heard too many versions of the word of God. The way to become born-again is now too complicated because there are way too many believes and ideas, too many different denominations. It's just too confusing for people like me who have too much free time to over think about everything. What Mizoram needs at the moment is not another pastor or denomination but people who reads Bible and making decisions by themselves.

To be honest I have some issues with Christianity. It is said that you have to be born-again to go to heaven right, so here's my question. What happens to our forefathers who had never heard the word of God because nobody told them. After they die will they go to hell? You have to be born-again to go to heaven right, it's just not fair because nobody ever told them about Jesus and the people who finally told them about Jesus were the same people who came to India so that they can enslave us politically and economically. Let me give you another example, let say I was stranded in an island by myself and I've never heard of Jesus, suddenly its judgement day and God asked me why I am not a born again Christian. Then I tell God that I live in an isolated island and the missionaries never came. Where do you think God will send me? heaven or hell? Am I being arrogant or blasphemous for asking these stupid questions?

I use to think that we were doing a great job sending missionaries to more backward places (I mean no disrespect to missionaries) but I am not so sure anymore. One of my friend in College asked me this, he was a Hindu, well, a beef eating Hindu but I can never forget what he said. We do open schools, health facilities and do other charity work in backward places and he said that we only do this as a bribe so that these people will convert to Christianity. He is implying that we blackmail these people into converting into Christianity. There was a time when there was a rumour that some people were bribed to convert into Hiduism in Mizoram and the church was not too please with it. I even hear pastors talking about it in the church.We bribe them, they bribe us so why complain. We are such hypocrites. One thing is clear though, the Mizo community is very intolerant towards other religions. I can only hope we don't involve violence.

I guess having doubts about Christianity or religion as a whole is pretty common among my generation. What happens when we die? Is there a heaven or hell? Are we just going to float around like ghosts with all the other dead people? Or do we just cease to exist? Life is full of unanswered questions.... What do we really know? What is the purpose of being here? Did someone put us here for a reason or are we here just by chance? Is being religious just a phase for people in the developing world? To be honest I couldn't care less if we are here by chance, and that our existence is due to some rare coincidence. I am not saying I don't believe in God. I mean lets face it, what do we really know about the Universe. We have only gone to the moon, Whats lies beyond our galaxy and what lies beyond that and beyond that. So maybe there is a God somewhere who created all this. When you think about these things you realize how insignificant we are and how little we really know.

Anyways, I have no choice but to go at least to please my parents. Maybe I'll experience some life changing event, Maybe I turned out like those really spiritual, slightly crazy people I was criticizing. I don't know. Plus this camping from what I've heard is going to be more like a Bible study, seems its not going to be the typical Mizo gospel camping if you know what I mean. On the bright side the preacher is Mr Lianchhunga, one of the best young BCM Pastors. I have heard some of his sermons and I like it coz I feel his sermons are based on logic rather than emotions, plus he's pretty good with Microsoft Powerpoint. But I'm still not too thrilled about it, especially coz it's during the holidays. Bottom line is my parents want me to go and I have been a brat for as long as I can remember. So got to take this one for the team (my family) I guess.

A Tribute To Friday

The best day of the week is Friday, obviously. It is the day that gives reason to people like me (lazy people)to get up every other morning to carry on with our lives because we know that it's not going to be like this every morning, there still is hope, a light at the end of the tunnel. Yes, there will always be FRIDAY.

I've come to realize that I don't treasure this particular day enough and I've devised a plan to make my Saturday morning a little more pleasant. I've told my mother that I have something important to do in the morning and she's going to wake me up at 5 am. That way I would wake up really early, look at my watch, tell myself it's Saturday and go back to sleep savoring every second. And all the other morning(s) can suck it. Awwwwww this feeling.

Here's to all the lazy people out there. Know that there is a reward after all the stress the weekdays throws at you, there will come a day when you can just relax and take a time out, and that day is Friday. The harder you work in the weekdays the sweeter your weekend will get.

But then if you works Saturdays and Sundays then I just feel sorry for you.  

So my mother will wake me up at 5 and I'll go back to sleep without a care in the world because its Friday and not Wednesday or Thursday and definitely not Monday.

I dedicated this poem to Friday to show my appreciation. It may not be that good but it's from the heart.

     Friday has come and passed

     The weekend has gone so fast

     Wake me up tomorrow at 6 am

     Here comes the rain again

     A good sleep can never last

     Got to get up at 6 am

     My alarm is ringing again

     Like it always did before

     To wake me up when it's 6 am

     Workdays will come and pass

     Even weekdays never last

     On Friday, I'll sleep till 10 am

PEACE

NEW JOB

SIR. That’s how I will be addressed starting next week, July 1, 2014 to be exact. No, I didn’t get knighted but I will start my new job as a substitute teacher at Carey English School where I was once a student myself.

I have always respected teachers and the profession. I have had several great teachers who have motivated me and whose words have guided me throughout my life. I believe that teachers have a great opportunity to help children grow up into great persons. Especially in the lower level, I believe that teaching the students their syllabus is just part of the package and I felt that teachers have greater responsibility of guiding their students and preparing them for the future. In my book, a good teacher is someone who inspires his students and gives them the courage to chase their dreams, big or small.

I truly believe in the words that I have just mentioned which puts me under a lot of pressure because I can’t tell what kind of teacher I am going to be. In spite of my best intentions I have no experience in teaching, I am very poor in public speaking, I am not a people person and I am not doing too well in the self-confidence department. So I have spent a couple of sleepless nights wondering what will happen on my first day and not that I needed to be reminded at this moment I remember this one friend from college who passed out in the classroom on his first day as a teacher. It can't get any worse than that. I know what you’re probably thinking; I am thinking about this too much and you think its not too hard as I made it sound. You are probably right but hey, that’s me and I can’t help myself. Welcome to my world.

On the brighter side I do have a Bachelor and Masters Degree in communication and right, teaching is part of communication. I’ve learned and written in so many of exam papers in College and University that teaching in a classroom is a Group communication and I’ve learnt by heart the do’s and don’ts in this situation. I just need to apply it here.

Coming back to CES, I studied class 1 and 2 here and it brings back a lot of memories. Some of my teachers back then are also still working here and even though I am nervous, I do feel like home already. The school has changed so much since I was a student there. I remember those times when it rained and we would shift down to a community hall just below our school because there was a real chance that our school building could collapse under intense rain. How sir Biaka would give us some of the most tiresome punishments I’ve ever suffered. How did he even come up with them? He was pure genius.  

Man I’m getting all nostalgic here, wish I had the words to express what I am feeling right now. I wonder where my CES classmates are right now? It’s almost been 20 years. Will we recognise each other if we meet somewhere, or we’d just be like strangers. It’d sure be nice to talk about the past.  

I’ll stop this post here because it’s getting a bit too long now and I don’t know how to end it. I’ll write some more later, Night night.